how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
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