It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
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She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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