Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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