Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
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All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
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