This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
