I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
