wrigley field is MILF paradise
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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