What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
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