the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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