Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
