did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
