Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
How does one acquire holy water?
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Randomize