Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize