I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
you never un-have a 4some
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Randomize
