I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Randomize
