Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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