Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
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