I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
