i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
