Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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