elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
