Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
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How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
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