I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
