Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
