Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize
