Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
farters have to be the big spoon...
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
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