I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
why is half of my head shaved?
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