PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Randomize
