remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
Found your dick twin last night
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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