not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
