their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I wish life had little blips of pornography
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Randomize
