Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Randomize
