Your dad touched me again.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
