That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
