the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
