is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Randomize
