so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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