So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize