Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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