kristin has been a bad kristin
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
She's the barista slut.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Mom said you looked used
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
