apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
