Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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