non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
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