So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
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