So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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