Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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