wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
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