"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
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