im about as happy as oj after his trial
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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