I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
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