it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
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I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
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On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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